Marcus Peters recalls that time he almost burned down Marshawn Lynch’s house
Marshawn Lynch didn’t need a show called “No Script” to describe his life, but he’s gifted it to us anyway.
The incomparable Oakland Raiders running back doing things like driving a tank, poking fun at a scientist and pranking the show’s producers. And all that prefaced an array of real-life antics that involved getting suspended for contacting an NFL official during a game, alongside rival cornerback Marcus Peters and, of course, spending his week off .
Now, with the Raiders on their own off week, another peek at the world of Beast Mode has arrived, and it has arrived with Peters, the Kansas City Chiefs‘ Pro Bowl cornerback and one of Lynch’s close friends, recalling that time he almost burned down Lynch’s house by making lumpias, or the Filipino equivalent of egg rolls, late at night.
Welcome to “Story Time with Marcus Peters,” as transcribed from Episode 5 of the “No Script” show:
Marcus Peters: I was staying at Marshawn’s for a couple weeks … I had already been tired from flying and doing all that stuff, so I just decided to, uh, I’m gonna make some lumpias. I started cooking and stuff, right? Mind you, I was tired and (expletive) while I was making them. I made about a good six of them. Probably a little bit more than that. Before I can even get to making that second batch of lumpias, I’m sleep. I’m sleep watching “Rush Hour,” right? I may have been asleep for probably like 10 minutes, bruh.
[Alarm goes off] I’m like, ‘Damn, why the (expletive) is it smoky in this (expletive)? It’s hella smoky in here. What the (expletive)?’ … I turn the corner and … You know how you got the stove and then you got the microwave? I couldn’t see none of that (expletive). It’s like black as (expletive) and it’s (expletive) burning. I forgot to turn the damn oil off. I think the heat and (expletive) and the grease started melting the microwave — the microwave, the plastic dropped in the hot (expletive) oil, and then the house caught on fire.
And I panicked. I ain’t never been around no fire like that, like a real one that was burning and (expletive). When I seen the flames and (expletive), I was spooked. So we tried to get some water and — woosh! — yeah, that (expletive)’s not working, ’cause, mind you, water and oil don’t mix. So we finally end up getting us some flour and (expletive) and throwing that (expletive) and putting it out. But it’s way more smoke than what the (expletive) we expected it to be. It’s black through the whole house now.
Marshawn Lynch: I came home, and my (expletive) house lookin’ like the Bay, (expletive), on the foggiest day … Like, man, I know I ain’t got no tint on my windows, blood. Look like it had gray tints on my (expletive).
Marcus Peters: So all the black smoke went up in his room and (expletive) up all his clothes.
Marshawn Lynch: Al my clothes got, what is it called — soot? All my clothes, all my (expletive), bruh, I just got some all-white Louis things, some steppers — I don’t even wear steppers — and them (expletive) was charcoal gray, bruh … And the worst part about all this is I ask these (expletive), ‘Damn, what happened?’ Them do this right here, though: ‘(Expletive), I don’t know.”
So, to recap … Marcus Peters ruined all of Marshawn Lynch’s clothes, including his white Louis Vuitton shoes, and melted his microwave along with nearly the rest of his house all because he fell asleep watching “Rush Hour” while cooking lumpias at night. That’s rich.
All indications are that Lynch and Peters are tight to this day, so you know that friendship is real.
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